Intro
I don’t like winter. I never have. There’s a reason why this prairie kid moved out to the west coast and never looked back. When I flew to B.C. 15 years ago to interview at a church, I saw a palm tree on Bridgeport Road in Richmond and I was sold. If there’s a palm tree somewhere in Canada, that’s where I’ve got to be! Even with palm trees, though, the thing you never escape from in Canada is the short, dark days of winter. You know, those days when the sun sets at 4pm. Bah! But I’ve been realizing lately (this was in March) that things are changing. It’s 5:30 and it’s still light out! This is awesome! Winter is on the run! There’s this slow gradual change that is imperceptible from day to day but when you look back a couple of months it becomes obvious. But one of my favorite days of all is when daylight savings time kicks in. Suddenly, from one day to the next, the sun doesn’t set at 5:30, it sets at 6:30. It’s the quantum leap, the dramatic, overnight change.
Change is like that in our lives. In terms of maturity, growth often happens slowly and imperceptibly. But once in a while, there’s an event that turns everything upside down. A quantum leap is made. We talked about that last week with the Ethiopian eunuch. Here was a man who had long thirsted for a knowledge of God, slowly inching forward. Then one day, through a meeting with a believer named Philip, the eunuch met Jesus in the Scriptures and became a new creation. A huge change took place in his life. Today we see the same kind of thing with a very different man, a man named Saul.
1. Who Saul Was
Meanwhile, Saul was still breathing out murderous threats against the Lord’s disciples. He went to the high priest 2 and asked him for letters to the synagogues in Damascus, so that if he found any there who belonged to the Way, whether men or women, he might take them as prisoners to Jerusalem.
Acts 9:1-2
Let’s begin by giving this Saul a little bio. By the way, if you’re new to all of this, you might not know that Saul is the same man we know of as Paul. If you see a church called St. Paul’s, or a hospital called St. Paul’s like we have in downtown Vancouver, this is the guy it’s named after. Others of you might think that Saul became Paul at the moment of his conversion. I read that in one of our kids’ bible story books the other night: Saul met Jesus and became Paul. And I said to my kids, nope! In reality, he is still called Saul after his conversion. When that changes in Acts is when Paul begins his missionary journeys to Greek-speaking places in the Roman Empire. Saul is his Hebrew name, named after the first king of Israel, who had a very questionable legacy. Paul is his Greek name. You see the same deal with immigrants to Canada who have a name in their mother tongue but go by an Anglicized name in their new home. Anyway, the point is Saul = Paul.
Saul was born in Tarsus, a city in what is modern day Turkey. However, he spent his formative years in Jerusalem, at the feet of the famous rabbi Gamaliel. These were probably two very different settings. One half of his life was spent as a cultural minority in an educated, sophisticated place where few others shared his family’s convictions. The other half of his life took place in a setting where every aspect of daily existence revolved around the faith of Israel. And it was in Jerusalem, it seems, that Saul flourished. He was a prodigy, a “wunderkind” as the Germans say. In Galatians 1, Paul says that “I was advancing in Judaism beyond many of my own age among my people and was extremely zealous for the traditions of my fathers” (Galatians 1:14). He was advancing in Judaism. People looked up to him, admired him for his knowledge. We also have Philippians 3, where Paul lists off a bunch of his credentials: “circumcised on the eighth day, of the people of Israel, of the tribe of Benjamin, a Hebrew of Hebrews; in regard to the law, a Pharisee; as for zeal, persecuting the church; as for righteousness based on the law, faultless” (Philippians 3:5-6).
Some of those are pretty loaded terms, but we’ll focus just for a moment on the Pharisee thing, which is also connected with the idea of zeal in both those passages. I’ve mentioned this before, but the Pharisees were a sect within Judaism. They believed that in light of the oppression of Israel by the Roman Empire, the Kingdom of God would break in and restore Israel to its place of glory and honor if the Israelites devoted themselves to obedience. In other words, they longed for freedom and the restoration of what once was. According to the Pharisees, God was waiting for Israel to follow what we call the Old Testament law, which would prompt Him to bring about the kingdom. This was Saul’s perspective. Not just perspective, this was his whole heart’s desire. Saul burned with zeal to see Israel purified and to see the Kingdom of God break into his midst. And he had some good biblical precedents for this kind of zeal.
Here’s one. In Numbers 25, a tragedy took place among the Israelites as they were traveling through the wilderness between Egypt and the promised land. On their journey, they encountered the Moabites. Some of the Moabite women seduced the Israelite men, quickly leading to these Israelite men worshiping the god of the Moabites. Idolatry, sexual immorality, the whole shebang! God announced to Moses that Israel must be punished for this, so Moses and other leaders began weeping in front of the tabernacle because of the sin of Israel. As they’re weeping, an Israelite man saunters past with a Moabite woman on his arm and takes her into his tent. Phinehas, a grandson of Aaron the high priest, is filled with rage. He grabs a spear, barges into the man’s tent, and drives the spear through the man, into the woman’s stomach, killing them both in the process. God says in Numbers 25:11, “Phinehas…has turned my anger away from the Israelites. Since he was as zealous for my honor among them as I am, I did not put an end to them in my zeal.” Phinehas was honored because of his zeal for the Lord’s honor, a zeal that led him to purge the evil from Israel.
Saul was driven by that same kind of zeal, and he absolutely believed he was honoring God just as Phinehas had. And the newfound recipients of his zeal were fellow Jews who were devoting themselves, not to the law or the traditions handed down from generations past, but to someone named Jesus. For Saul, this was blasphemy in so many ways. Fellow Jews were worshiping a man. That was bad enough, but this was a man who had been declared guilty by Israel’s leaders and hung on a cross. Saul knew the words of Deuteronomy 21:23, which said that anyone who is hung on a pole, or on a tree, is under God’s curse. A cross is close enough to both of those things. It would have been obvious to Saul that if Jesus was hung on a cross, he was far from a Messiah. Totally the opposite! Jesus was under God’s curse! It must have been incredibly, deeply frustrating to him that some of his fellow Jews couldn’t see that obvious fact.
Not only that, but Saul had heard the preaching of men like Stephen. We looked at this a few weeks ago. Stephen was a Hellenistic Jew who preached persuasively about Jesus. He showed how Jesus had fulfilled the point of the temple- God’s presence was not to be found in a physical building, but in Christ and now in those who trust in Christ. Stephen showed how Jesus had fulfilled the law’s purpose. But Saul couldn’t hear that. What Saul heard was Stephen undermining all the core elements of Jewish faith in the name of this disgraced would-be Messiah. He heard blasphemy, heresy, and dishonor, and so yes, he was filled with zeal. In the tradition of Phinehas, Saul decided to do something about it.
Now, before I tell you what he did, let’s be clear that there is such a thing as truth, and God has revealed truth to us in His word. And let’s be clear that it is good to be zealous for truth and for God’s glory. Paul says in Galatians 4:18, “it is fine to be zealous, provided the purpose is good”. Don’t take from this that you should be lukewarm, untouched by evil or by wrong thinking about God. Don’t take from this that you should not hold fast to biblical truth. Saul’s issue was that his understanding of the Scriptures had not been informed by the Holy Spirit, but instead by human traditions. Even more than that, his view of Jesus had not been informed by the Holy Spirit, but instead by human standards. That’s when zeal will get you into trouble.
But before it got Saul into trouble, his zeal landed a lot of Jesus-followers in trouble. In Acts 7 and 8, Saul plays a significant leadership role in the death of Stephen, the first Christian martyr. He approved of his death, smiled upon it, believed that it was good. In fact, it emboldened him, spurred him on to do more. Acts 9 tells us that it wasn’t enough to round up believers in Jerusalem. They wouldn’t escape his clutches that easily! So he received authority from the high priest to travel to Damascus, a city 200km northeast of Jerusalem. With letters from the high priest, the synagogues there would help Saul track down any Jewish followers of Jesus. Acts 9:1 describes Saul’s state of mind in this moment like this: Saul was breathing out murderous threats. He was like a raging bull, and the matador’s red sheet was the name of Christ. He was single-mindedly determined to wipe this movement out, filled with anger and hatred, spewing venom. Saul was a tornado headed directly to wherever Christians fled.
There is little as scary as someone who is so filled with anger and hatred that rational thought seems to have gone out the window. Especially when it’s a leader invested with authority. You know this. You could paint Vladimir Putin with that brush. Imagine what it is like to be a Ukrainian and know that this powerful person is directing all his hostility in your direction. Some of you are from Hong Kong and have some of that same experience regarding Xi Jinping and the Communist Party of China. Some of you have even felt this way about Canada and our government to some extent or another over the last couple of years. The world can feel like a terrifying place when men like this run the show. That’s what it was like for some 1st century believers when they thought about Saul of Tarsus.
2. Who Jesus Is
But that was all about to change in one of the most famous scenes in all of history, in what is probably the most famous conversion story of all time.
3 As he neared Damascus on his journey, suddenly a light from heaven flashed around him. 4 He fell to the ground and heard a voice say to him, “Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?” 5 “Who are you, Lord?” Saul asked. “I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting,” he replied. 6 “Now get up and go into the city, and you will be told what you must do.”
Acts 9:3-6
We’re going to talk about the change that came to Saul, but let’s be crystal clear about one thing: the reason and the impetus for his change didn’t come from inside of him. That’s what lots of people in our world today would have you believe. That you have control of your own destiny, the strength within you to do whatever it is you set your mind to, blah blah insert Disney song title here blah blah. The change in Saul had nothing to do with anything in him. It had everything to do with someone outside of himself. It had everything to do with meeting Jesus.
Here’s what Saul must have recognized about Jesus, at least in a beginner’s sense, through the course of this experience.
1. First, he would have recognized that this individual was glorious. At this point, he didn’t yet know who it was. But on the road to Damascus, Saul was stopped dead in his tracks by a blinding light from heaven. This caused him to fall to the ground. What the text doesn’t say here, but indicates later, is that it wasn’t just a light Saul saw. It was Jesus himself in all his glory. In Acts 9:17, Ananias will tell Saul that Jesus himself had appeared to Saul. In Acts 9:27, Barnabas will testify to believers in Jerusalem that on the road to Damascus, Saul had seen Jesus and that Jesus had spoken to him. Paul’s own claim to other churches later in his life was that he had witnessed the resurrected Jesus. And his experience of Jesus was so glorious and overwhelming that he fell to the ground.
There’s a similar passage in Revelation 1. The apostle John, by now a very old man, is in prayer on the island of Patmos (some suggest that Saul was in prayer when this happened to him in Acts 9). Suddenly, John receives a vision of Jesus with eyes like blazing fire, feet like bronze glowing in a furnace, his voice like the sound of rushing waters, holding the stars of the heavens in his hand, his face shining like the sun in all its brilliance. John says that when he saw this, he fell at his feet as though dead (Revelation 1:17).
Your image of Jesus might be of some humble carpenter. And that’s true in terms of his incarnation. But that isn’t how Paul found him. Or, years later, John. That’s not true of Jesus in terms of his resurrection and ascension. He is glorious, astounding, dazzling, he is far too great for human senses to even comprehend. Face to face with the ascended Jesus, unveiled in his majesty, human beings fall to the ground as though dead.
2. Second, he would have perceived that this glorious individual was deeply connected to certain humans on earth. It probably took a bit of time, but he soon realized something even greater: that Jesus was so connected to his own people that whatever you did to them, you did to him. Notice what Jesus says. “Why do you persecute me?” Not, why do you persecute innocent people? Not, why do you persecute my people? But, why do you persecute me? Saul is persecuting Jesus himself.
Some people in our church have been forming discipleship groups that dig deep into fundamental biblical truths. In the chapter on the church, the author talks about how the church is sometimes seen as an organization whose job is to keep the memory of a great historical figure alive. That’s if they’re being charitable. They usually have a lot worse things to say about the church. But no, that’s not what the church is.
“On the contrary, the church is a divine organism mystically fused to the living and reigning Christ, who continues to reveal himself in his people.”
Greg Ogden, Discipleship Essentials
An organism fused to the living Christ, who reveals himself in his people. That’s huge. And it makes sense of why Jesus says what he does here.
This is why it just doesn’t work for people to claim to be Christians without any connection with other believers. This is why for as often as the church has not lived out its true identity, it just doesn’t work to cut yourself off from the church, because you are in fact cutting yourself off from Christ. What you do to the body, you do to him. Saul thought he was persecuting a rogue band of unfaithful Jews. Instead, he was persecuting the glorious, ascended Jesus himself.
3. Third, once he heard that the figure who had appeared to him was Jesus, he would have understood that Jesus had been resurrected. Obviously, Saul knew that Christians believed that Jesus had risen from the dead. But he also obviously had no time for that, because there was no way in his mind God would raise someone to immortal life in the middle of history, before the end had come. In this moment, his preconceptions were shattered.
By the way, this contributes to one of the great pieces of evidence for the truth of Christian faith. A man like Saul had devoted his life to a certain direction. That direction led him to having authority to arrest and imprison followers of Jesus. Then, suddenly, in the blink of an eye, he stops. He turns and runs in the opposite direction. He abandons all credibility, all authority, starts proclaiming that Jesus has been risen from the dead and is the glorious king of the universe, and subjects himself to the same kind of persecution he once dealt out to others. Why? Why in the world would he do that? Because he saw the risen Jesus! Why did a bunch of disciples, so weak and unfaithful, hiding away from the authorities, suddenly find a power and boldness to proclaim to the world that Jesus was alive even when that got them killed, and not one of them recanted? Because Jesus rose from the dead! Why did Christian faith explode in Jerusalem, the city where anybody should have been able to point out Jesus’ dead body? Because the body wasn’t there! Jesus rose from the dead! This is the turning point in Saul’s life, the shattering of his previous worldview, and the birth of something new.
4. Fourth, and very much related, Saul realized in this moment that Jesus had been vindicated. The resurrection of Jesus was God’s very public statement that Jesus was in fact the Messiah, the anointed one, the king. The resurrection of Jesus meant that anyone who was for Jesus was for God, and anyone who was against Jesus was against God. That hasn’t changed, by the way. It hasn’t changed, no matter how much our world wishes to believe that all paths lead the same direction, that all that matters is that you believe sincerely. As Jesus says in John’s gospel, “no one comes to the Father except through me” (John 14:6).
And you understand what that meant for Saul, right? In that moment, he understood that for years, he who had devoted himself to the zeal of the Lord had actually been against God. He was on the wrong side. He might have had all the human power and influence on his side, he might have believed that he was fighting for a certain kind of justice. He definitely believed sincerely! However, that all came crashing down when he saw the resurrected Jesus.
5. And fifth, he would have understood that Jesus was Lord. I don’t know if he realized right away that Jesus was fully divine, God in the flesh. I don’t know how long it took him to believe that Jesus was LORD, capital letters. Maybe it was right away. But he certainly realized, in light of everything we’ve said, that Jesus had authority. And that Jesus had authority over Saul. So when Jesus told Saul to do something- to go into the city of Damascus and wait until he received further instructions- Saul wasn’t going to question this.
Jesus is Lord. That is one of the fundamental claims the early Christians made. It’s what Jesus told the disciples just before he ascended in glory: “all authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me” (Matthew 28:18). Which means that every earthly king, queen, prime minister, president, premier, mayor, every dictator, every earthly power is ultimately subordinate to Jesus. And they will be held accountable. Again, you might be filled with rage because this or that leader has acted in corrupt and even despicable ways. Jesus knows. He understands all the intricacies far better than you. And these human authorities will answer to him. They will bow to him in the end. Believe that. And, I would add, the best chance any corrupt human authority has at actually changing direction is to come face to face in some way with their Lord. So let’s pray for that. Let’s get on our knees for that.
The bottom line here is that change does not come from within us, it comes from an encounter with someone outside of us. It comes from seeing the fulness of God unveiled in Jesus. I want to read you something exactly along these lines from a book Nate and I are reading together. Here it is:
“One reason you see modest growth and ongoing sin in your life- if that is indeed the case- is that the Jesus you are following is a junior varsity Jesus, an unwittingly reduced Jesus, an unsurprising and predictable Jesus.”
Dane Ortlund, Deeper
If you want change, it starts with allowing the Scriptures to deepen your knowledge, your relational knowledge, of Jesus.
3. How Saul was Changed
7 The men traveling with Saul stood there speechless; they heard the sound but did not see anyone. 8 Saul got up from the ground, but when he opened his eyes he could see nothing. So they led him by the hand into Damascus. 9 For three days he was blind, and did not eat or drink anything.
Acts 9:7-9
Here we begin to see the change in Saul. Remember, Saul was a young prodigy, confident in his knowledge. He was a tornado, filled with self-righteous zealous rage, seeking to destroy the church everywhere he found it. Contrast that with the picture here. Saul is now blind. He must be led by the hand into the city. He is in fact so broken, so humbled, that he refuses to eat or drink for three days. That’s an act reminiscent of other figures in the Bible who have become deeply convicted of sin, who realize they are worthy of judgment. They fast. They sit in ashes. They mourn.
See, you might think this is the wrong direction. And you might definitely think that leaving the story here this week is a bad move. Let’s get on to the inspiring part! Let’s see Saul filled with a new zeal, let’s see him healed! And that happens. We get there. But not before stopping here, where Saul sits with the recognition that he is a far greater sinner than he ever thought, in far greater need of salvation than he ever recognized.
And you know what? That never left him. It’s not like he grew stronger, experienced more of life, and realized that he wasn’t that bad after all. It’s not like he recognized later that he just needed a little bit of help, a nudge in the right direction and then he could take care of the rest. You listen to what he wrote decades later, near the end of his life, to a young man named Timothy. You tell me if that’s how he thought:
“Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners- of whom I am the worst.”
1 Timothy 1:15
The worst of sinners. It was this, the deep conviction that he was so completely unworthy, that all his efforts had only worked against God’s anointed one, this breaking and shattering and deep, deep humbling, that led Saul to become perhaps the greatest tool in God’s plan to proclaim the Gospel. It was what continually filled him with a sense of awe that Jesus had saved him. Not helped him or given him a good example to follow. No, rescued him. Brought him from death to life.
That book by Dane Ortlund I quoted earlier really tracks the movement in Saul’s life. The first chapter is all about how growth comes from having a deeper knowledge of Jesus. The second chapter is how real growth comes from self-despair, which is exactly what happens to Saul. The author says that if we minimize the evil inside of us, we actually limit our growth. Because here’s the thing: “the severity of our condition dictates the depth and seriousness of the medicine we know we need.” (Dane Ortlund, Deeper) If I think it’s just a headache, I take a painkiller and go to bed. If I know it’s a brain tumor, I rush to get surgery and undergo chemotherapy.
So many people in our world think they just need a painkiller. They think their sin is only skin deep. Look at Saul. In the eyes of his community, he was righteous. He was zealous! He was faultless according to the law. And yet he described himself as the worst of sinners, because he had seen the glory of Jesus and the depth of the evil within himself, no matter how others viewed him. That was the first thing that changed about him after his Damascus experience. Is that true of you today? Do you know even a fraction of the evil in you? Do you recognize that it is not a painkiller you need, but dramatic, life-saving, open heart surgery? Do you despair of your own ability to save yourself?
That may not sound appealing. And it is not a place to stay forever. But it is the place that God does His best work in us. It’s where He reveals the magnitude of His grace. It is where we discover the wonder of His salvation. It is where we stop putting our confidence in ourselves and lean entirely on the strength of Jesus.
Conclusion
Many years later, Paul would write these words:
“For God, who said, ‘let light shine out of darkness,’ made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God’s glory displayed in the face of Christ. But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.”
2 Corinthians 4:6-7
He is glorious. We are jars of clay. And yet He has loved us, revealed Himself to us, filled us with His love, all because of His grace. That’s incredible.
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